When a child’s anxiety is high and their emotions are all over the place, that’s usually a nervous system issue first and an academic issue second. If he’s feeling overwhelmed and lost, pushing forward academically often backfires. It can reinforce the “I can’t do this” feeling rather than build skills. Going back to easier basics is not the same as “holding him back.” It can be strategic. If he’s missing foundational pieces, filling those gaps can actually accelerate progress later. Confidence and competence build on each other. The bigger question isn’t whether he’s putting his “all” into it. It’s whether the work is at the right instructional level and whether he feels safe and capable while doing it. A regulated child can learn. A dysregulated child usually can’t access what they know. You might consider: – Identifying exactly where the breakdown happened (specific skills, not just grade level) – Temporarily reducing volume while increasing success – Adding predictable structure so he knows what to expect each day – Separating “he won’t try” from “this feels too hard” Advancement doesn’t always look like moving ahead in the curriculum. Sometimes it looks like rebuilding stamina, confidence, and skill depth.

A reader emailed me: My grandson was home schooled Part of last year and part of this year and started back to home school in January and doesn’t want to go back, his anxiety is high and emotions are all over. I feel it I because the program we used didn’t follow the school and he is feeling overwhelmed and lost. I plan on home schooling again. Should I go back to the easier basics so he is more comfortable but am worried he will not keep advancing if he doesn’t put his all in to it. Thoughts?

Any change to the IEP should be data driven. Has the school shared data with you to support this reduction in support? If there are conflicts with the data, you want to err on the side of caution and gather more data before making a change.

Is the meeting being scheduled because they want to reduce the minutes or is it an annual review? What is the "recent behavioral data"? When was the last school evaluation done? Did it include an FBA? What are the disabilities? What grade is the child in? How many disciplinary referrals have there been, especially OSS? I'll try to answer your question in general terms. Try to stop the reduction in minutes at the meeting so that it never gets to the point of doing next steps after a PWN. That is much easier. If you don't get what you want in an IEP meeting, the options left to you are limited and can be cumbersome. Make sure you have the data you need to support your position. Unfortunately, the general education teacher(s) will be the most relevant data, and you have no way to control that and whether or not it is entirely forthcoming. But you can look at other data: Are grades slipping? Is the school calling you to pick them up? Have there been many disciplinary referrals? What are they showing at home - fatigue, hating school, etc.? Have a quick "interview" with your child after school each day and keep a journal. That can be data. Depending on your state, next steps could include not signing the PWN (but most will go into effect after 10 days, anyway; you can also write directly on the PWN stating what you disagree with and why and ask that this version be included in the educational file), requesting a facilitated IEP meeting (if your state offers those), request a mediation, file for due process. Due process will invoke "stay put" and keep your child's minutes the same until resolution of the due process. However, this option is not for the feint of heart, an attorney is highly recommended, and it is not a "parent-friendly" venue.

The school is proposing to reduce my child's 1:1 minutes. There is recent behavioral data to support that this is not warranted. An IEP meeting is being scheduled and I just want to make sure I am going about this correctly. If I disagree with the change and ask for a PWN, what are the next steps?